Accidental Podcaster

I remember where I was when the first “podcast seed” was planted and how I felt as a result of that seed. One of my best friends and I were having a strategy session. She said, “You know what Sister Wife, you should start a podcast.” I immediately began to weep. It never ceases to amaze me when I hear a close loved one speak truth into my life. The tears were the admission of feeling woefully under qualified, ill equipped, overwhelmed at the thought of hosting a podcast. The other emotions I felt was terror and fear. Terror that someone saw me and saw something spectacular that I would add to the world and fear that I may actually be good at podcasting.

Another friend asked me, “Why don’t you start a podcast?” a month later in September 2016. At this point, I had left Las Vegas, Southern California and was back in my hometown of Ann Arbor, MI and my self-esteem was plummeting.

After the literally tearing apart of the Union (the US) in November 2016, I ended up recording four episodes over the long holiday weekend. I thought about families would not talk to one another during the holidays because of how they voted. I thought about friendships that may end. I also thought about how if we were going to start to heal, there were some significant acknowledgements that needed to happen first. Moreover, I didn’t realize the resistance and the revolution were gaining steam. They had already started with the civil rights movement and yet there were more people who were being empowered to resist and lend their voices and resources to advocate for others.

I started to shoot high in terms of folks I would invite to be guests on the podcast and I got an opportunity to speak with some well known people. I also spoke with so many every day people that helped me understand what it is like to live with mental illness, recover from substance use disorder and survive sexual assault and/or domestic violence. Each guest has taught me more about life and about myself. They have shown me how beautiful humanity is.

There were times I was the guest and talk about vulnerability, authenticity and baring your soul not only for the world to see, but to judge. And yet I couldn’t afford to think about that too long because by showing up in all of my glory, I gave permission to others to show up in all of their glory.

I decided I am actually good at this work, folks feel comfortable in my presence, perhaps it’s because I’m an empath, or a peacemaker or I’m an INFJ or perhaps all of the above and because the Divine created me this way. Everything seems to come together when I speak with another member of humanity and we share stories and become more conscious + aligned.

Photo credit: Mel Bosna